6 tips for looking forward while loving your life now
As a life coach and Enneagram Type 1 (The Perfectionist), I can get caught up in the lies that “more is better” or “if I can only improve ‘this’ aspect of my life I’ll be happy.”
There is nothing wrong with self improvement, setting goals or wanting more, but when your head is filled with ideas for improvement in every category, you feel burnt out and are unable to enjoy the present. Raising my hand here!
Here are a few ways to Love Life Now and Look Forward at the same time.
Love Life Now
Keep a gratitude journal: It’s no surprise studies show that grateful individuals experience more positive emotions, are more satisfied with life, and experience fewer negative emotions including depression, anxiety and envy. Whether you write down what you’re grateful for at night or in the morning, the key is consistency and using specifics for each item. For example, instead of saying, I’m thankful for my health, what specifically are you thankful for. What were you able to do today because you are healthy? I’m thankful that I’m able to pick up my 6-year-old and swing him around. At 50 lbs. it might be a strain, but he still giggles like a toddler and I love it!
Write a DONE list: So often we’re focused on what we didn’t get done that we fail to acknowledge how much we DID do. Rather than only track the little things, I write down the important ways I showed up during the day for myself or my people - being patient with a coworker, listening to a friend, making a healthy dinner for your family, or finishing that annoying task that’s been on your list for months.
Practice mindfulness: Ever caught yourself eating a bag of Doritos at your kitchen counter, scrolling through your phone and the next thing you know the entire bag is gone? Oh, me neither. The point here is so much of our day is on auto-pilot and we forget to acknowledge the amazingness that is right in front of us. The beautiful trees, the brilliant sunset, enjoying a meal without any distractions. It’s hard not to find something awesome when you make an effort to pay attention.
Look Forward
Limit your goals: But I have so many! To that I say, it’s really hard to truly focus on more than 1-2 goals or habits you want to change at any one time. Ever heard the saying, “A rising tide lifts all boats?” Let’s say you want to finish writing your book, reorganize your house, decorate your office, and start a blog. I’m suggesting you pick only one of those and knock it out of the park. By focusing on one goal at a time, you can dedicate your full mental energy and when you crush it, you’ll gain confidence and have momentum to conquer the next goal. By contrast, when you work on many big goals at once, you can feel frazzled and defeated very easily.
Make your goals S.M.A.R.T: Goals should be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time Bound. An example of a SMART goal for “I want to exercise more” would look like “I am going to take 2 barre classes and lift weights 2 times per week for 30 days at my local gym.” Specific - What does exercise more mean? Take it step further by deciding on times and locations in advance, and put it on your calendar! Measurable - you can easily track your progress by looking at your calendar. Achievable - with your current workload and schedule this feels challenging but achievable. Relevant - this goal fits into your bigger goal of having more energy. Time bound - you would like to complete this goal and turn it into a habit at the end of 30 days. Bonus: In advance, decide how you’ll celebrate this accomplishment!
Choose a Word of the Year: Choosing a word or intention for the year can be such a powerful, guiding force throughout the year. I find that if I put my word in a place I’ll see often it makes me that much more conscious about my actions. My 2020 word is CREATE. I want to create more than I consume. Create more than I compare. Create the life I want. I love Susannah Conway’s workbook for choosing your word. It’s never too late to choose your word!